|Total Episode Count||145|
|Written By||Abraham Higginbotham|
|Directed By||Jim Hensz|
|Air Date||September 23, 2015|
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"The Day Alex Left for College"
Haley’s attempt to stop Andy from proposing to Beth will end up with both Haley and Andy needing to cope with their emotions and both will have their own special ways of doing so, and Phil and Claire seem to only make matters worse. Jay and Gloria look at pre-schools for Joe and get a rude awakening after they realize the competitive wait list to get in. Meanwhile, Cam tries to remain supportive of Mitch’s midlife career crisis, but money is getting a little tight, so Cam comes up with a scheme to get Mitch’s old job back.
The month, 'May', appears on the screen and it seems we're in a flashback. We see that the entire family is on screen excluding Cameron. They are all playing, laughing and talking amongst each other. We then see Cameron, who is on higher grounds, holding up his phone, we hear him speak and it's evident he has something in his mouth. "Haley, your Dad's on the phone, he says it's urgent!", Claire shouts up to Cameron, "He's with a surgeon?", Jay then jumps in with "I think he said sturgeon", Mitchell then shouts up to Cameron, "Cam, is it surgeon or sturgeon?". Cam then starts talking to himself "I am ripping these stupid braces off the second I get home" he then starts talking to Phil down the phone, "Phil, hold on, I'm gonna put you on speaker phone, OK?", Cam then puts him on speaker phone and Phil shouts down the phone, we hear a few words but not enough, "Andy's on his way to-" the whole entire family then shout "We can't hear anything!", Mitchell then tells Cameron to toss him the phone, although the family tells them both no, as the phone might not land in the correct place and since Cam is up at such a higher ground level than them, it could instantly break. Mitchell then says "No, you're right. We all have our strengths. I'm a great gift giver." it seems that the family also know that Mitchell can't catch. Claire then shouts Cam's name up to him, holding out her hand, she catches the phone and it seems that Claire is the one with the strength to catch. Claire then walks over to Haley and Haley asks "Dad?", Phil then begins: "Haley, Andy's on his way to propose to Beth!", we hear the entire family gasp all at once. Claire then says down the phone "That's very sweet", however Phil tells her it's not sweet and explains why: "Haley and Andy love each other, but they don't know it!", the entire family then "Whoa" all at once. Claire then asks Haley if it's true or not. Haley then asks Phil what makes him think that Andy's in love with her. Phil then tells Haley, "I could tell by the way he hugged you goodbye.", Claire then asks Phil if he's sure that he knows they're in love as it could mess things up terribly, Phil then tells Claire "Claire, I think I know the look of love in another mans' eyes", which is a very awkward thing to say for Phil. Haley then gets excited "This is crazy! Should I call him?", Phil then explains "His phone's off but he said he was going to the beach", Haley then states that she knows what beach he likes and Luke then states "I thought you were the "beach" he likes.", Lily then gives him a high five for saying that.
We cut to Haley and Claire getting out of Claire's red car and running to the beach. Haley then spots Andy and Beth as they are walking away from them, "Oh, God, there they are! Should I do this? I shouldn't do this! I'm gonna do this!", Claire then tells Haley that Claire suddenly stops Haley and says "You got to be really sure of this, you're gonna go over there and break them up for what? To hang out or to date until the next guy comes along?", Haley then asks "Who knows? But, shouldn't we get a chance to find out what we are?", Claire then tells her that she's just telling her that she should maybe take a look at what life is going to be like if she does this, what she's going to do with her life in the future: "You're 21, and that looks like a guy who is ready to settle down.", Haley then turns back around to see Andy and Beth, Andy gets on one knee and proposes to Beth, she starts to cry as she says "I guess it's decided for me", realising that she should let Beth and Andy be together and not break them up, for herself. She then states that she feels like an idiot and Claire then tells her she's not and has nothing to be ashamed of. Claire then tells Haley that Beth and Andy have turned around and are coming back and they need to hide.
[INTRO THEME SONG]
We see the month 'June' appear on the screen and it seems we are now in June, a month after Haley chose to not talk to Andy about her feelings and break up Andy and Beth. We are in the house of Cam and Mitch with Lily, Mitchell is looking very stressed out and Lily notices, "Daddy looks tense", she asks Cam what's wrong with him and Cam tells her that he's just paying bills. Cameron then walks over to Mitchell and asks if everything is OK with him. Mitchell then expresses his irritability, "Oh, you walked over here? I just thought you Uber-ed everywhere", Mitchell then gets up and says he has to breathe, and then rhetorically asks if breathing is still free to do. Mitchell and Cameron are very tight on money and Cam has a job as a Gym Teacher but Mitchell hasn't found a job yet. Cameron tells Mitchell that every thing is going to be fine and Mitchell hits back with "Really? Cause I haven't worked in weeks. I have no prospects. We're living off of a gym teacher's salary, and (Mitchell laughs) -and somehow I let you talk me into buying the apartment upstairs.", Lily then asks "What's going on, are we poor?", Cam then explains to Lily: "No, while other daddy looks for a job, I'm gonna be taking on some work as a summertime driver's Ed teacher.", Lily then asks how much it pays and Cam tells her that every little bit helps. He then looks at Mitchell and tells him that before he knows he's going to be back in a lawyers office wishing he took advantage of this moment. Mitchell then tells Cam that it doesn't not sound like him. Cam then tells him he should take up painting and Mitchell agrees.
We are with Haley, Claire and Phil, in the Dunphy household. Phil walks in asking if Haley and Claire spent their whole day quilting, Claire then tells Phil they did and they enjoyed it, when she asks Haley if she also did, Haley tells Claire that she's stopped crying so she somewhat probably did. Claire is "interviewed" where she says "To help get her mind off of Andy, Haley and I have been making a quilt out of all her old clothes and some stuff I need Phil to stop wearing.", we come back to Haley, Claire and Phil, Luke has joined the group. Phil notices that there's a square in the quilt; that Haley and Claire are making, that is the same pattern as something he wears. Alex and Sanjay come in the room and Alex asks Sanjay if he can believe how gorgeous it is outside, Sanjay then replies with: "And now it's gorgeous inside.", Alex and Sanjay share a look and Sanjay says "Because you're inside, was that clear?", Alex then asks Sanjay if he wants to go and quiz her on the periodic table. Sanjay then states the elements "Oxygen, Potassium", which spells out 'OK', with their symbols. Haley then says "Aww, well that was fun for me.", Haley then asks her Mom if they can drink now, Claire tells her its lunch time and Haley takes this as a 'no', Claire corrects her saying it means 'yes'. Claire then gets up to get a drink for her and Haley, Phil notices that Claire might be enjoying it a little too much: "Sad Haley needs her Mommy again?", "Haley's wallowing in self-pity and you're feeding off of it". Claire then tells him that he doesn't know what he's talking about. Haley then tells her Mom she's going to have a nap. Claire then asks Haley if she wants her to snuggle with her until she falls asleep and Phil then takes that as a sign to stop the "pity party" and take the family out to the movies, he then walks up to Haley and realises that she doesn't smell OK, and asks Haley when the last time she washed was, she replies to this by asking what day it is, which tells Phil that she seems a little bit lost and depressed, Phil then says "We will wait!".
We are with Gloria and Jay, who are with Manny, who are looking for a pre-school for their son, they arrive at one. We hear Jay ask "I know you can't tell me but that B. Willis Jungle Gym, that's Bruce Willis, right? His kid goes here?", the teacher tells them that they pride themselves in privacy at Davenport, and can't tell them the answer, but then she says that Jay may have a sixth sense about it; which basically says that Jay is right, although she wasn't supposed to give out that information. Jay then says that B. Willis looks like the type of guy who you could have a beer with. The teacher then tells Jay and Gloria that the school has 1 educator for every 4 children and then is interrupted by Manny who asks a question. "I have a question. Uh, I attend high school with one of your graduates, a Theodore Durkas, did you turn him into a monster, or was he always like that?!", the teacher then says that she remembers Teddy Durkas, and he was a lovely boy. Manny then says that he'll tell him that the next time he is turning one of his nurples purple. We then hear a loud crash and Gloria exclaims "Ay, Joe, what did you do?!" we see that Joe has knocked over something. The teacher then says that it's not Joe's fault, "These cubbies were donated by a former parent who fancied himself a carpenter. I can't say who, but it is ironic that he couldn't use a hammer, and now we "can't touch this"." Gloria then points out that the teacher keeps saying that she can't say anything but then gives out the information that she's not supposed to say. The teacher then tells Gloria in a very depressed but fake happy way, "it's just nice to talk to adults.", Jay then tells the teacher that they're sold and want to put Joe in the pre-school. The teacher then tells them that they're smart for choosing the pre-school, but says that they can only accept Joe for next year and not this year, the teacher suggests that they go to The Learnin' Barn, Gloria says that she approves of it as it sounds nice, Jay then asks "The Learnin' Barn sounds nice?!".
We are now with the Dunphy family excluding Alex, who are at the mall, Claire, Luke and Haley meet up with Phil, who says that he got the family tickets to "The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel", Luke then states that he knows Phil was kidding but he found the first one incredibly moving. Haley states that she never realised how many people hold hands in malls. Claire then offers to hold Haley's hand. Phil turns around and says that he thinks he spots Dylan, Claire turns around with Haley and starts to get scared that Haley and Dylan could get back together so she says "No. No, that's-that's definitely not Dylan.", however Phil shouts his name and he turns around, he introduces himself by saying "Hello Dunphy family!", Phil then asks Dylan how he's doing much to Claire's disapproval, disappointment and disgust. Dylan then replies by saying "Life's a roller coaster, but I'm tall enough to ride.", to which Phil says "True dat." once again trying to prove that he's down with the kids and the slang. Dylan turns to Haley and tells her that she looks "as yummy as ever" to which Haley thanks him for the compliment. She then asks him what he's been doing lately, he tells her that he's making t-shirts with a v-neck and putting any words with the letter 'v' in it and using the v part of the t-shirt to complete the word and then trying to get stores to sell them. Dylan then tells them he's wearing one now. Phil then asks "Lie?" and Dylan corrects him "Live, the neck is the 'v'", Phil then tells Dylan it seems like a game changer, Dylan then says he's still got v words left he then lists them "'Love,' 'dove'" and is interrupted by Claire who wants Dylan to leave and says "Leave" but not loud enough for the family and Dylan to hear. Dylan continues "Governor". Dylan then asks Haley out for a coffee and she accepts saying she has nothing else to do. Claire then looks at her and says "Uh, movie?!", it seems that Haley doesn't really want to go, Dylan then tells her that not all 'v' words work, it's slipped his mind she was talking to Haley about what she's supposed to be doing instead of having coffee with Dylan, Haley then walks off with Dylan. Phil then tells Dylan and Haley to have fun but Claire turns to Phil and gives him a look, and then imitates him from earlier shouting "Hey! DYLAN!!", trying to tell him that calling him over was him making a mistake.
We see the month 'July' appear on the screen meaning we are now in July. We are the household of Cam and Mitch. Cameron calls out "Mitchell? Are you aware our daughter's eating a ketchup sandwich?", Mitchell responds with "Good she found something", Cameron then says "Oh! So you didn't go grocery shopping today?", Mitchell tells Cam he is going but after Yoga, he then suggests that Cam try yoga as he seems really tense, Cam responds with "Oh, well, maybe they have a five-minute class I could sneak in between football camp and Driver's Ed?", although he jokes, Cam then takes a step back and tells Mitchell he is actually very proud of him and his new hobby. Cam then walks over to Mitchells' painting and Mitchell tells him it's the Chrysler Building. Cameron is then "interviewed", where he says "Mitchell really embraced this whole 'take a little break' thing far more than I expected. But for years, he supported both of us while I pursued my passions: photography, hip-hop dancing, fox hunting. So I couldn't be the one to tell him to get a job. But maybe somebody else could.", we then see Cam walk into a shop called 'Pain', we then see him call out to a Charlie, a person who used to work with Mitchell. At first Charlie is confused but then Cam says "My husband Mitchell, used to work for you!", Charlie then remembers who Cam is and says "Oh! I remember you. Yeah, what a nice surprise.", Cam then replies saying "I know, crazy!", we enter into an "interview" with Cameron who says "Crazy like that fox I told Mitchell was chicken... Was it clear? I-I stalked Charlie.", we come back to Charlie and Cam, Cam then lies and says "I can't believe it, Mitchell and I were just talking about you last night, how are you?", Charlie then tells Cam he doesn't want to burden Cam with his problems, but says "I think I've outgrown my boat", Charlie then asks how Mitchell is, and Cameron comes out with it and partially lies, "Actually, he's fielding a few job offers right now, and he's running into problems because he keeps comparing everyone to you. Sometimes I think the only thing that's gonna make him feel better is if you offered him another job." Charlie accepts this and says he'll give Mitchell the job and he'll talk to Mitchell as he misses that "$3 bill", which evidently receives a look from Cam.
We are now with Haley and Dylan who have been together for a month now as we are in July, we are at the Dunphy family household with Haley, Dylan, Luke, Alex, Sanjay, Claire and Phil. Haley asks Sanjay and Alex, "You scheduled your break up?!", Alex replies "Yes" and Sanjay informs her "Labor Day, that's when I leave for school.", Alex jumps in with "86% of long-distance relationships end in failure. It's the only logical course of action.", Haley then tells her that it's the least romantic thing she's heard and then tells them to stay together and try to make it work. Luke then tells Haley, Alex and Sanjay "Wrong. Break up. College is the sexiest candy store in the world. You don't want to show up with your jaws wired shut.", Dylan then tells them "No, take it from Haley and me. It's hard to be apart and then together and then apart and then together and then apart and then turned down by the Marines and then together.", Claire seems unapproving of Dylan being back as she states "I can't believe we've got that dodo back in our lives." Phil then tells her that at least Haley is happy and not depressed. Claire then tells him to take the t-shirt off, he is wearing one of Dylan's t-shirts. Phil then states that they loved it at the Deli. Andy walks in and tells Claire and Phil that he just wanted to give papers to him and says that they're the closing on Baywood and the Johnsons' offer, all set for signatures. Phil tells him that he's "done a real Mitzvah, buddy", and Andy says he hopes that means something good. Haley sees Andy and they have an awkward introduction. Dylan then sees Andy and introduces himself as "Haley's boyfriend", which alarms Andy. Dylan explains: "We're like magnets that sometimes take a break to date other magnets. What happened was... we were apart and then-" he is then cut off by Claire turning on a mixer hoping to drown Dylan out.
We are back with Jay and Gloria, excluding Manny, who are now at The Learnin' Barn with the teacher. The teacher, Jay and Gloria all talk as we hear a Chicken in the background, Joe lets go of Gloria's hand and runs off shouting "Chicken!", as he chases after a chicken, Jay shouts "Joe! Joe come back here!", the teacher tells Jay that it's OK, the chickens won't hurt him as they're used to being around kids and playing with them. Jay then asks "Chickens are part of this?", the teacher then tells Jay "We like to utilize the setting here in the hills, make nature a part of the experience. We sometimes see mice or raccoons or little squirrels.", Jay then states that they have traps for mice and raccoons, Gloria then states that she loves the atmosphere and wants Joe at The Learnin' Barn. A kid then states "Erica, I need you!", shouting out to the teacher, Erica. Erica then tells Jay that she is sorry and a kid now needs her and runs off to deal with the child. Jay then turns to Gloria and tells her "We're out of here. She's a loon, letting kids call her "Erica" like they're poker buddies.", Gloria then tells Jay that they're too late for anywhere else, but Jay is stubborn, "If Bruce Willis can jungle-gym his way into that fancy school, then I can.. I don't know, I can cubbie my way in. They hate their cubbies? I'll make them new ones. Cubbies are nothin' but little closets.", Gloria then tells Jay to look at Joe, as he loves it and is having fun with the chicken. Gloria then states, "He's chasing after the chickens." The chicken then clucks and Gloria states that "He even caught one." We hear the Chicken squawk and Gloria and Jay then look confused and they realise that Joe is trying to hurt and kill the Chicken, Gloria calls out "Oh, no! No! No, Joe! Let go!", the chicken squawks one last time and stops all together, it's evident that Joe has killed the chicken now. Erica comes back and looks at Joe and then Jay and Gloria, Gloria states, "We will be very happy to pay for that chicken.".
We are back with Cam and Mitch, in their household. Cameron comes home with Charlie, Cameron tells Mitch that he has seen Charlie, Mitchell says "Charlie!" and Charlie states that he didn't know Mitchell painted, seeing Mitchell with painting equipment and the art he already created, Mitchell tells him that he didn't know he painted either and tells him "It sort of started as a therapeutic thing, but then I just really fell for it.", Charlie then tells them that he always wanted to paint, and says "Damn it! Why am I not painting?" when he sees Mitchells' art. Cameron is quick to jump in with "Well, you're so busy running your company. Maybe if you hired more people, you'd have more time." which becomes a hint to Charlie to announce to Mitchell that he is giving Mitchell as job. Charlie ignores this and says "I sleep with so many actresses and models who are into guys with jets and boats and ski houses, but I always wondered, wouldn't it be more satisfying to sleep with actresses and models who are into artists?", Cameron jumps back in with "Anyway, you were saying how overwhelmed you were at work." still trying to hint to Charlie to just tell Mitchell he is giving him a job, but once again they both ignore it and Charlie starts up a painting conversation with Mitchell "I'm overwhelmed by this work. How do you decide what to paint?", Mitchell then explains "You know, I just see these images in my head, uh, things I want to see, places I want to go, uh, how much paint I have left. Um, sometimes I just tap into my emotions, and I see where that takes me. And- you cannot imagine the sense of contentment.", Cameron then tries his hardest to hint again "Imagine how much more satisfying it would be after a good day's work." Charlie then states "You know, I came here to talk you into coming back to the company, but you're the most at-peace son of a bitch I've ever met, and I hired the Dalai Lama for a pool party.", Cameron then sighs "Hmm".
We are back with Phil and Claire in the Dunphy family household, they are still with Andy, who thanks Phil for the paperwork, and says "I will drop these at the office on the way out of town. So, unless there's something else?", Phil then states "You're something else!", Phil then looks at Claire and says "Claire, get this man a cupcake", to which Andy declines saying he has a wedding tux to fit into pretty soon, Phil then tells him "All right, get out of here. Happy motoring.", Claire and Andy then exchange goodbyes and Claire asks "Where's he off to? Utah for a month to plan his wedding.", Claire then states "I'm kicking myself. Andy is great. And if I hadn't opened my big, fat mouth, Haley might be with him right now instead of with Dylan. Hmm.", Phil then asks why she is 'hmm'ing, and Claire tells Phil it's nothing he then makes her say what it is "Oh, I was just wondering what would happen if Andy were to find out that Haley almost-" and is cut off by Phil telling her "No! We are not meddling like that!", Claire then states that she is not going to meddle but compares what she wants to do with what Phil did "But you meddled when you called Haley and told her that Andy liked her." Phil then states "That's a far cry from telling Andy Haley was in love with him and raced to the beach to stop his proposal.", a throat is cleared and it's evident that someone is in the room with them now. Phil hopefully asks "Luke?" knowing he doesn't want it to be Andy, as he would've just told Andy what Haley did. Andy then says "Nope. Ohh. I accidentally took your pen. I didn't want to go plan my wedding with something so big weighing on my mind.", Phil then says "Andy, I am really sorry. I didn't mean for you to hear that." Andy then says "Do not worry. No big dip!" Phil then asks "Really?" and Andy says "Sure! It's actually kind of funny, you know? 'Cause how crazy is life? I was all, "should I propose to Beth? I have feelings for someone else." Meantime, I was talking about Haley. Haley apparently had feelings for me, and I had no clue! How could you not laugh at something like that, right? (he then fake laughs hard as he bites into a cupcake) Oh-oh-oh! Ohh. Mmm! So good. All right. Mmm. Happy Fourth. I am so fine.".
We see the month 'September', appear on the screen and we fast forward one month. The whole entire family has gathered for dinner at the Dunphy household. Claire is now seen wearing one of Dylans' tops to support him even though she doesn't like him. Jay does ask about this "What's, uh, 'e-olve' mean?" Claire corrects him saying "Oh, no. It says 'evolve.'. It's one of Dylan's designs. The neck is the 'v.'", Jay then states "There's two 'v''s" and Claire states "There can't be two necks" and Jay asks "Then why even do it?", Claire then tells her Dad not to make her defend it, as she's trying her hardest to support Dylan. Gloria then tells Claire to ignore him as he's just grumpy because Joe's new pre-school starts tomorrow. Phil then states that it's hard to deal with them leaving the nest for school. Jay then states that it's not Joe leaving he is grumpy about. Jay is then "interviewed" where he states "All I wanted was to bribe my way into that fancy school by making cubbies stuff didn't fall out of." We then see a kid get stuck in a cubby and we hear drilling as a driller prepares to saw the kids' head off. We then cut back to their "interview" where Gloria says "We can't say more. Litigation is pending.", we then go back to the family. Cameron, Mitchell and Lily have arrived and Cam says "All right!, who's ready for my famous chicken salad?", Lily then gives it to Claire and tells her "We need the foil back", we then see that something is in Mitchells ear and Claire asks what, "What happened to your ear, Van Gogh?", Mitchell then tells her "I was painting sunflowers outside, and I got stung by a bee. You know, I take it as a compliment." Manny walks past and asks "From the bee community?" Mitchell focuses on the fact that Claire has hung one of Mitchells' paintings. "Oh, my goodness, Claire. That's one of mine. Oh, that looks so good there.", Phil then states that he loves the colors and it makes him feel happy. Mitchell then states that he calls it "Rape of the Immigrant", to which Phil gives Mitchell a look for. Cameron then states that he think he left the brownies in the car and Mitchell offers to get them. Cameron then asks "Okay, what is wrong with you people? I am dying here, âtrying to hold down two jobs while you enable a once-proud man who is clearly having a talent-free breakdown. You know why he reminds you of Van Gogh? It's because he's earning nothing, and he's losing his mind!" Andy then comes out and says "Hey, everybody! Guess who's back?!" It seems that Andy has gained weight over the month and Phil and Claire don't recognize him, Gloria asks "Who? Who's back?", and Andy says his name. Phil says "Andy! Sorry, it took me a second." Andy, trying to cover the fact that he gained weight, avoids embarrassment by saying "No, I know. I-I'm parting my hair a little differently. That's one thing that's new about me. Beth likes it this way", meanwhile everyone else is focused on his weight. Cam says "I-I love it, looks great." and Claire tries it to "It looks great!" Andy then gives gratitude.
We are outside the Dunphy house, with Alex and Mitchell, Alex walks up to Mitchell and says "Hi, Uncle Mitchell" to which Mitchell says "Hey!", he then sees that something is wrong and asks what's wrong. Alex says " Nothing. I-I just said goodbye to Sanjay. We broke up." Mitchell then says "No.", but Alex tells him "No, it's-it's, it's great. We're, we're both going to school unencumbered and ready to focus. It's the smart thing to do. We both feel really good about it." Mitchell then tells her "You don't look like you feel good." and Alex says " Well, yeah, he was-he was sadder than I imagined, so I'm being strong for the both of us, which he said he admires. I think. It was hard to hear him with all the John Legend and the sobbing.". Mitchell then sighs and groans and says "You know what? I recently went through a very hard time, and I found something that really helped me navigate my feelings." although Alex already knows where this is going and says "I don't want to paint", Mitchell says "Painting."
We are back inside the house, we see Phil and Claire watching over Andy who is eating. Claire says "Oh my God, right?", Phil says "I am freaking out", Claire asks "You don't think that's because of what he heard us say do you?" and Phil brushes it off "No, lots of people gain weight during their engagement, you did", Claire interrupts with "I was pregnant." and Phil states that he's trying to find a way that Andy's gaining of weight doesn't point to them. "I don't want to believe we're responsible." but Claire tells him that they are, "Clearly, Andy has been stuffing his face ever since he found out that Haley almost stopped his proposal.", Haley and Dylan walk in on their moment and Phil says "We have got to start talking in the garage.", Haley then asks Dylan to make her a plate of food. And Dylan says "If I can make a bong out of a carrot, I think I can make you a plate." Haley then asks "You told Andy I tried to stop his proposal?" Claire then states "Not on purpose. Before he left for Utah, your father and I were privately discussing how bad it would be if he found out, and Andy overheard us.", Haley then asks "What did he say?", Phil tells her "He said he was fine", he then drags Haley to a view of Andy and says "but now we're not so sure". Haley then asks "Oh, my god. Oh, my god, that's Andy?" Claire and Phil affirm it's him. Haley asks "You think he got fat 'cause of me?" Phil then tells Haley it's possible and then tells her yes. Haley then asks "Should I talk to him about it?" Phil tells her that it has to be her decision and they are through meddling with her love life although Phil and Claire then say one more thing that would encourage Haley to be on one side or the other, Phil wants Haley to be happy and be with Dylan and leave Andy alone because he's already engaged so he says "Though I will say he's still very much engaged" and Claire, who wants her to have nothing to do with Dylan as she doesn't like him, says "Whereas, I would want to know if he got fat because he was still in love with me. And now we're out." which leaves Haley to be undecided and then has to deal with the fact Claire and Phil said they wouldn't meddle and then said things they were still actually meddling.
We are back outside with Alex and Mitchell who are painting. Mitchell asks "See, don't you feel better?" Alex affirms that she doesn't but Mitchell says "Don't stress out about light and perspective and-and color. You know, just let your painting be what it wants to be." Alex asks her Uncle to come over and see if her painting is good, Mitchells groans and asks why she is so good at things and Alex tells him that she's very good at a lot of things and Mitchell says he is also very good at most things but then adds "usually". Alex then realises that not only is she very good at a lot of things but so is Sanjay, she then realises that she needs to go and rush to him before he leaves, she runs off and Manny comes out. Manny notices Alexs' painting and thinks it's Mitchells' as Alex is gone and Mitchell is standing in front of the painting. Manny tells Mitchell "Wow! You're really getting better!", but Mitchell tells him to go inside, slightly angry as he knows Alex is better at painting than him.
We are back inside with Joe, who is stamping on the piano, Jay rushes in and tells him to get down and leifts him down when he doesn't. Gloria comes rushing in after Jay and asks "What happened?" Jay then states "This is why he shouldn't go to your commune. He'll fall,those hippies won't notice, and he'll be eaten alive by chickens." Although Gloria states "I think we have established that he can take care of himself around a chicken. You keep forgetting that Joe is tough. He's part me." Gloria then points at Mitchell who is throwing around his own painting smashing it up and says "That's the son that you should be worrying about." Jay then states that he thought he was done with Mitchell. We then see him go outside and see him walk outside over to Mitchell, who has stopped smashing up his painting. Jay asks Mitchell how he is and Mitchell tells him he has a splinter and a few other issues, that are made evident when Jay speaks, Jay asks "You know what's happening here, don't you?" when Mitchell has a blank face, Jay carries on "You're having a mid-life crisis.", Mitchell realises is actually is and sighs "Oh, my God.", Jay then states "Some guys: it's fast cars and women. Me: it was golf. You: it's just a little gayer." Mitchell then states "I know like 10 lesbians who could out-golf you." Jay then says "The point is when you're wound as tight as we are, you're bound to snap." Mitchell then says "Yeah, yeah, I-I've just been working so hard for so long. And now that I've stopped, I'm-I'm having a hard time starting again." Jay then says he gets it and he did the same thing with golf. Mitchell then tells Jay that he knows he isn't a good painter "Look, I know I'm not a good painter, dad. I was just hoping to feel a little bit better before going back to work.", Jay then tells him he won't feel better until he does go back to work and then tells him he should also get a haircut.
We are now back inside with Haley and Andy. Haley sits down with Andy and tells him she knows that he found out about her going to the beach Andy then tells her he didn't know she felt that way about him and it would have been nice to know it. Haley tells Andy that it would've been nice to know that he felt the same way about her. Andy then stops it by saying "A lot of things would've been nice..". Haley then comes out with it and asks Andy if he has feelings for her right now. Andy tells her he's engaged and Haley tells him that he didn't answer the question directly. Andy gets up and asks her why she's picking now to talk about it. Haley then says it's because she worried "about all (she points to his stomache area) this!", Andy then asks "What? My weight?!", Haley affirms it and Andy tells her it'll all drop off in a seconds, Haley then stands up and says "Andy, don't you think that there is a chance that you have been eating because you regret getting engaged to Beth?" Andy then says "Why would I do that? Beth is amazing." Haley then tries to correct him "Beth is a psycho who tried to light my hair on fire." Andy then competes with her "Meanwhile, Dylan is in the backyard trying to make a plate out of sticks.", Haley then defends Dylan "Well, at least he knows what he wants and goes for it." Andy then states "Then I guess it's a good thing that we didn't get together." Haley states it's the best decision she ever made. We then see that Claire and Phil have been listening the whole time and Claire, knowing that Haley and Dylan may have to stay together she says " I'm not gonna lie, Phil. I might need to get back into that." Phil the agrees "Yep."
There is an ending scene where Alex runs over to Sanjay, who is getting in a car, she shouts to him and he says "Oh, god. I can't say goodbye again." Alex tells him "We don't have to, we're basing this decision on a statistic: 86% of long-distance relationships end in failure, correct?" Sanjay then says "Of course, 'correct' you never misquote a statistic". Alex then says "And neither would you. When have we ever been in the bottom 86th percentile of anything?" Sanjay then says "Never. I'd kill myself. (he then realises) we're in the top 1%.", Alex states that she learned how to paint in an afternoon and Sanjay says he developed an app last night to feed his fish from college. Alex tells him that if anyone can make it work it's him and her. They then hug each other as the credits roll.
(The characters striked out do not appear in this episode)
- Jay Pritchett
- Gloria Pritchett
- Manny Delgado
- Joe Pritchett
- Claire Dunphy
- Phil Dunphy
- Haley Dunphy
- Alex Dunphy
- Luke Dunphy
- Mitchell Pritchett
- Cameron Tucker
- Lily Tucker-Pritchett
- Adam DeVine as Andy
- Justin Kirk as Charlie Bingham
- Reid Ewing as Dylan Marshall
- Vicki Lewis as Erica
- Suraj Partha as Sanjay Patel
- Susan Egan as Miss Ford
- Laura Ashley Samuels as Beth
- Mai Brunelle as Preschooler
- This is the first episode in which both Andy and Dylan appear on screen. In "Connection Lost", Andy was only pictured.
- Third episode to revolve around a day in summer after "Suddenly, Last Summer" and "The Long Honeymoon".
- This episode is set exactly six years after the "Pilot".
- The intro was updated slightly. The Pritchett-Delgado family now features the newly casted Joe, a change of clothes and Stella is now included in the scene. Despite the addition of Stella, Larry is still not included along side the Pritchett-Tucker Family.
- Haley mentions that Beth set her hair on fire, which happened in "American Skyper".
- Sarah Hyland has had a haircut. In the May and June flashbacks, she appears to be wearing hair extensions to keep with continuity.
- Andy and Dylan meet for the first time.
- Beth only makes a cameo in this episode.
- Alex and Sanjay are seen to be dating, they break up breifly, and get back together.
- When Cam walks over to Mitchell, Mitchell gets irritable and tells Cameron he thought Cam just Uber-ed everywhere.
- The teacher, when talking to Jay, tells him he has a 'sixth sense', when Jay brings up Bruce Willis. (Making a pun on the movie that Bruce was in.)
- Phil states that he got the family movie tickets to see "The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel". Luke then states that he found the prequel to the movie incredibly moving.
- Both Claire and Cameron refer to Mitchell as Vincent Van Gogh because of his ginger-ness, painting and going crazy.